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My fellow Generation Xers might remember the popular dance band with the hit, "Things That Make You Go Hmmm ...." The song's well-known lyric plays in my head every now and then when I see something that makes me think, "Did that really just happen?"
Like the trash-talkers at a sporting event where their team pulls off a big scoring play, and their fans flash the No. 1 sign. Huh? Do you see you're still down 35 points in the fourth quarter ... look at the scoreboard.
If you're driving along and someone pulls out and cuts you off. You slam on your brakes as they speed off and away, but what's done is done.
Or people who take photos or videos at concerts or games from the nose-bleed seats (and I used to do this). Do you really want videos or photos of players or musicians that look like ants? Google the event online if you want photos as keepsakes, they are much better.
Other things that make me go hmmm:
1. Why do they make scented toilet paper? Sure, it covers up unpleasant bathroom odors. It comes in lavender and grapefruit scents, among many others. But it costs more and you're flushing that money down the toilet.
2. Why do you need an appointment to see a psychic? If they know you're coming, you'd think they would also know not to double book themselves.
3. If the bottle says, "Do not use if seal is broken," then how are you supposed to break the seal and use it? It's one of those warnings that doesn't work after the product is used.
4. How does Tarzan not have a beard? He lives in the jungle and I'm pretty sure there's no power for his Norelco electric razor.
5. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? I feel like this is a debate like which comes first, the chicken or the egg.
6. Why do you turn down the radio when you're driving and looking for an address? I do it because I can only focus on one thing at a time. It also might be that I'm listening to pop music from my youth. A guy still needs a few guilty pleasures, right?
7. Do "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" and the "Alphabet Song" share the same melody? Stop, nobody wants to hear you sing that. They do share the same tune as the alphabet song is based on the common nursery rhyme.
8. How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of murdered? Assassinations are usually reserved for politicians who are murdered.
9. Your favorite circular pizza comes in a square box, why? The simple answer is that square boxes are much easier to work with, allowing easy folding, storing and carrying. The corners also provide better protection during delivery, keeping that pizza safe and warm.
10. People say that they slept like a baby, but don't babies wake up every two hours during the night? Just saying. I don't have children, but my cats are up at all hours of the night.
11. Why is the word "abbreviated" so long? Abbreviations - an even longer word - are silly at times. In my line of work, there are rules when to use them and others when to skip them. I have trouble remembering what those are, let alone how to spell a five-syllable word.
12. Where are all the baby pigeons? It's because baby pigeons - called squabs - stay in the nest for 4 to 6 weeks. So they are effectively adult size when they leave the nest. I know humans they do that, too. I was not one of them.
13. Before the invention of drawing boards, what did people go back to? It's a cliché, but still.
14. Fish swim in water, but do they ever get thirsty? Apparently not. However, some fish use oxygen in water to breathe.
15. Can you imagine a world without any hypothetical situations? Might be a tough scenario.
16. How can something be considered "new and improved," if it's brand new? What was improved?
17. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, would it be considered homeless or naked? I didn't even think it could live without one.
18. Why do professional sports teams hire coaches that have been repeatedly fired by other teams? I get that front offices change frequently, but if the guy loses over and over why keep thinking he's going to turn your team's fortunes around. It's the same with mediocre athletes who cash in on big contracts to remain mediocre.
Oh, the things that make you go hmmm.
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Greg Williams is a reporter and Sunday Night Editor for The Sentinel. A Mifflin County native, he has been writing for The Sentinel since 1991. His column, "Virtually Home," appears regularly.