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According to the words of David Bowie, "Aging is an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been."
The older I become, the more I believe that to be true. We are the sum total of our life experiences. I once heard a motivational speaker who put it this way, "You will be the same person in five years that you are today, except for the books you read and the people you meet." Even though many years have passed since I first heard that statement, I have never forgotten it. Everyone we meet along the way becomes part of who we are. I think that is why I enjoy getting to know so many people. Each new acquaintance is an opportunity to expand who I am.
The aging process is happening to all of us, no one is exempt, and it is up to us to decide how we are going to handle it. May, I recently discovered, is "Older Americans Month." It was first proclaimed so in 1963 by President John F. Kennedy. Every president since then has also issued a formal proclamation during the month of May. It is a month set aside to commemorate and acknowledge the countless contributions older adults have made in the lives of those around them as well as in their communities.
Where would any of us be without their wisdom and experience? We need to ask ourselves, are we utilizing their many gifts and talents? They are such a valuable resource to be respected, valued, and most importantly integrated into our lives and into our communities.
We need to make a conscious effort to teach our children by example to be respectful and to have an appreciation for the experience and skills older Americans possess. We can accomplish this by giving of our time. Our lives can quickly become filled with other things, but if we do not stop and take the time to listen to their amazing stories, they may one day be gone forever. Legacies that will never be passed to the next generation.
I will never forget sitting with my uncle, listening as he recounted his story. Tears streamed down his face as he described what it was like to experience the horrors of war. He was only a teen when he became a soldier during World War II and endured things no one, regardless of age, should ever have had to. His story was filled with loss, pain, and regret. I feverishly wrote as quickly as I could trying to capture his every word. It felt as though I was holding a sieve and if I wasn't careful his precious words would slip through the holes, never to be retrieved. His story was now part of me and who I am, tying me to him, forging a lasting connection.
One of my most faithful friends is 21 years my senior and has been by my side through adversity, pain, happiness, wins and losses and has done so without judgment or condemnation. She faithfully supports me with love and understanding. My family became her family and I have cried on her shoulder more times than I care to count. When I am sick, I can always count on a daily call and often soup or iced coffee outside my door. This kind of friendship is rare and precious. This relationship has taught me that love has no age constraints or limits.
I guess my point is this, I encourage all of us during the month of May, and always, to remember that our seniors have many lessons to teach us. They have experienced many changes and have handled many of life's challenges. They can share with us the wisdom and knowledge they have gathered that will spare us from making some of the same mistakes and aid us in making positive, life-changing choices. I have heard it stated this way, "Listen to your elder's advice not because they are always right but because they have more experience in being wrong." Oh, and even more impressive, they made it through school with only a set of Funk & Wagnall encyclopedias at their disposal, no Google or Wikipedia!
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Rhonda S. Kelley is Executive Director of the Juniata River Valley Chamber of Commerce.