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Greetings in the precious name of our Jesus! This morning, I'd like to share, once again, little stories of my grandchildren and how they so often speak to my heart. I hope you never tire of hearing of our grandchildren. God tends to speak to me through the everyday things of life.
We have a little grandson who wrestles. He is six years old. Wrestling can be hard on a little boy's heart, if you ask a grandma. Winning is fun; losing, not so much. This little guy had won every single match the whole season, except one at the beginning. As our son would send videos of the matches and the ribbons at the end of the tournaments, pride for his accomplishments would rise up in our hearts for both he and his parents. We'd been down this path many times throughout the years of our own boys competing. Proud as I was of our grandson, it was always in the back of my mind how fun it is when we're winning, not so much when we lose. Alas, it happened! Our grandson went to the last event of the season, and lost his first match. It caused him to become undone, reducing him to tears like you'd expect of a six year old who believed he was unbeatable, and he couldn't regain composure for the following matches. Instead of taking first place for the season, he had to settle on second. Which meant no belt buckle for him for being the champion. Hard on grandma's heart, too. Why do I share this?
Sometimes in life, we go about our daily routines and think we are winners, or we at least believe we are currently winning. Isn't it so easy to get up each day, have our "quiet time with the Lord", and get about our day…untouched? If you've followed my writing for any length of time, you are aware that I hide nothing. I tell it like it is. Why is it then, that I can simply go through the motions of meeting with God each day, and often it has little effect on the rest of the day? It should never be so, yet that's the truth of the matter. What am I missing? What might you be missing, as well?
I just finished reading "Not a Fan", by Kyle Idleman. I kept thinking there was something familiar about it, but I was half way through the book when I realized that I had already read it. As a matter of fact, I had it among my books. Now I have two! Old age! Kyle has a passion for being a follower of Jesus and not a fan. His passion has spread world wide…but has it really? How is it that I read this very impressive book about living out true faith as a follower of Jesus, yet I had even forgotten its contents?
Kyle talks about the way fans of Jesus live. They wear the right clothes, listen to the right music, go where they ought and not where they ought not, have the fish on their bumpers…on and on. I know you get it. Their hearts have not been moved to the point of going deeper with God. But why?
When Jesus was calling His disciples, He said, "Come, follow Me." Most had excuses, or at least postponements. Jesus would have none of it! He quickly told them that anyone who would come after Him must pick up their cross and deny themselves. Turns out, the cost of following Jesus in the truest sense has more to do with sacrifice and self denial than anything else. He is not impressed with our outward display of our religion. He is longing for a changed heart.
Kyle ends his book (sorry to ruin the ending for you) by telling us about a plaque he made for himself that sits on his desk. It simply says, "I…Die…Daily. When I first read that (or for the second time now, frowning emoji), it took my breath away! I so want to live for Jesus by dying daily! Here's what I've come to face, though…dying daily means dying momentarily. It's in the unexpected request of a friend or family member that I hadn't anticipated. It's over the coffee with a soul teetering on the verge of faith. It's in that moment when our feelings have been hurt and we want to retaliate. It's in the realization that a relationship is about to end and our heart has been deeply wounded. It's in the everyday stuff of life! To be true followers of Jesus, and not merely fans living defeated lives, He calls us to deny ourselves. The life we long for comes through the death we fight.
What does any of this have to do with my little grandson winning and then losing? In my mind, he's more of a winner because he lost! Here's why… if our lives were always in the winning lane, we'd soon become puffed up with pride. Pride comes right before a fall, you know, right? Sometimes, we have to fall, so that we can get back up, knowing we need Jesus more than ever. In those moments, we are more prone to go deeper with Him. Once we reach this point, the only thing that changes is…we move away from Jesus! He hasn't moved. He longs for intimacy with us. We wander around, going through the daily routines of "quiet time with the Lord" only to realize later, it may have been just that…quiet time, but we never heard from Him at all. Maybe we don't hear because we don't like what He asks of us. Remember, friend, there's no life without death. I. Die. Daily.
During last Sunday's message, the Pastor asked if we could honestly say that we see the fruits of the Spirit growing in our lives. I was undone! I sat there, going through them…Love? No. Joy? Not. Peace? Little of that. Patience? Huh uh. Kindness? Not always. Goodness? I try. Faithfulness? Not as I'd like to see. Gentleness? Not much lately. Self control? Do we have to talk about that one, too?? It turns out I must have pride. No, I'll claim it and repent of it! No more outward displays of what I think I need for approval from the world! I need Jesus! Nothing less! I need to die daily to myself with all my "rights" and longings and goals for my life. I. Just. Need. Jesus.
I pray that while you've been reading, friend, that if indeed, you see these things in yourself currently, you'll simply bow your head right now and ask His forgiveness for forgetting that at the end of our lives, the only thing that really matters is…Did we live and die for Jesus? Amen. Now, pick up that cross and follow hard after Him. Never mind the falls, bumps and bruises along the way. He'll use them, too…all for your good and His glory. Amen?
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Debby Renninger is a freelance writer and inspirational speaker. She holds a Bible study in her home in McVeytown, where seeking women are always welcome. She may be reached at (717) 250-7086 for speaking engagements.