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Good morning, dear friends! What a lovely morning, in spite of the bugs and humidity I encountered while on my walk just now. But, thank you, Jesus for victory today! Today, I conquered a goal to reach "the big turn"!
Our seven year old Levi, "that dog"…our beloved beagle, needed some exercise. I told him that I'd agree to it, but only if he agreed to drag me along. He's done his part, to say the least. I had decided it was time to shape up. You see, about two years ago, I had lost forty-two (to be exact) pounds. I just felt really good! My mind was so clear and focused on the journey ahead. With much determination, less food, more water, endless walking, and my heart set on God, He and I accomplished the task. Down 42. Well, I never learn, it seems. As soon as I'm comfortable or satisfied, I quit. I go back to my old ways of eating, not drinking water, not walking and yes, even a drift of my heart from the Lord. Not consciously, but a subtle drift that I never saw coming. It turns out, my life is too often like a see-saw, up, down, up, down. May I say that I am up right now! So, I share my heart with you all.
It's usually not a deliberate decision to drift from our first love, is it? It's all the everyday, little, seemingly insignificant decisions we make, right? Just one donut, after all, we work so hard, and we deserve a treat, right? Or, I walked extra yesterday, so I can take a break today. How about this one? Really? Only water? Yuck! Give me something tasty, something with lots of sugar, just this once. Worse yet…"Lord, I read an extra chapter yesterday. Isn't it ok to skip today? Yes, Lord, I did read, but you understand I was on a mission and didn't take time to pray, but I read. Doesn't that count?" That one will bite you, just like all the rest, but this one, skipping our time each day with God, at least for me, sets the course for my day and affects every single decision I make that day!
And so, with much deliberation, Levi and I set out this morning to walk further than the last three days. Today, we wanted to walk to "the big turn". Huff, puff, gasp, sweat…one foot in front of the other, with eyes focused on that turn…around. We did it! When we got there, I raised my hands to the sky and lifted my eyes to the heavens and yelled, "Thank You, Jesus!" At that, we turned around and headed home. This way was all downhill. Easy street. As we walked, my heart was so in tune with God and all He was sweetly whispering to my heart about myself…"Daughter, when will you ever learn to just be steadfast, to walk so closely with Me that you hear me speaking softly to you? I long to share the secrets of MY heart with you, but you get so easily distracted. You've told Me a million times how desperately you need Me. How do you so easily forget? Don't you see how you turn away from me and stumble through your days, alone? Helpless and hopeless?" At that point, I say, "Thank You for loving me, Lord, even when I'm so unlovable. Thank You for never giving up on me. Thank You for drawing my heart closer to Yours again. Thank You for teaching me all about Your grace and mercy."
I am fully alive today, as I write. How soon I forget! You, too? I've always said, "As long as there's breath, there's hope." I forgot! I'm so very thankful for my circle of sisters who know me well, love me anyway, and pray for me always. Reason being, if I'm left to fend for myself, I make a tremendous mess!
Recently, we were blessed to have two of our Colorado grandkids spend the night with us. Dear little three year old Ady, came to Pappy at 3 a.m., saying, "Pappy, there's something moving in my bed." Pappy told her, "It's just Levi. He's protecting you." She simply responded, "OK" and went back to sleep. How sweet! But my heart heard, "It's just Jesus. He's protecting you." For absolutely certain, Jesus is close by, protecting me from myself. How I long to sleep so peacefully, knowing God is watching over me. Trusting, like my little granddaughter.
Another phrase I am known to say is, "We lose our way. We get knocked down. We get back up again." (Thanks to a Toby Mac song I cherish, "Get Back Up") This side of heaven, we are but frail humans, with a carnal side that taunts us and drags us away from God so often. Oh, to be so steadfast that the enemy has no choice but to flee from us! He must! He will…if when we get knocked down, we get back up again, and continue to walk with the Lord.
Let me say to you reading this morning, this is not about losing weight or getting in shape, unless your goal is to get in shape for Jesus. Being our best selves, physically, mentally and spiritually go hand in hand with being our best for God. That is my goal. Can I be blamed if I lose some weight along the way? Amusing, right?
As Levi and I were finishing up our morning walk today, in the distance I saw a doe and fawn standing along the road, just mesmerized by us. We got fairly close before she bolted into the woods, with her little fawn close at her heels. The Lord said to me, "See? There is always somebody who is watching you. There's always someone who needs the hope in me you offer. There's always someone who will try to stand up to you and stand against you, as you witness for Me. But have no fear -- carry on. Stay faithful! Get knocked down occasionally. That's all part of life on this side of heaven. Just stay focused on me, like that doe was focused on you and hand in hand, we will conquer this mountain -- and this life together.
It just dawned on me -- as Levi and I have been walking together, I have joked with my husband that it's the other way around. I felt like I was having to drag Levi. Not this morning! Levi got on a bunny trail and literally drug me up that mountain! Um. What, Lord? And I finished up my walk by croaking out Jen Johnson's song, "Goodness of God". "All my days, You have been faithful. All my days, You have been so, so good. With every breath that I have, I will sing of the goodness of God." Well, maybe if I keep at the walking and singing, soon it will glorify God. I love You, Lord Jesus. It amazes me how You even use "that dog" to draw my heart closer to Yours. Give me strength and courage to keep my gaze set on You.
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Debby Renninger is a freelance writer and inspirational speaker. She holds a Bible study in her home in McVeytown, where seeking women are always welcome. She may be reached at (717) 250-7086 for speaking engagements.