RICHFIELD – There is an addiction problem in the Juniata Valley that no one is talking about, said one local pastor.

Like any addiction, it consumes the individual and tears apart families.

This isn’t an opioid or even alcoholism.

The addiction is pornography.

“In the beginning I was not aware of it. I assumed there was no problem here,” said Pastor Aaron Benner of Richfield Life Ministries.

Five or so years ago, Benner said, another local church held a “Band of Brothers” event where the issue was discussed at length.

One of Benner’s parishioners came to him after attending the weekend event.

“He said to me, ‘I have a real problem. Why is no one talking about this?'”

Because of this realization of his sin, Benner said, the man asked to be baptized again because he believed his first baptism was meaningless because he did not truly confess his sins and seek out a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

Benner explained that because this man had been baptized publicly a few short years prior, he needed to now publicly explain why he chose to do this again.

His admitting of his problem with pornography opened up old wounds for other men in the church.

Seth Beech had just begun his role as the new family pastor at this time, and he brought a video series entitled “Conqueror,” to the church for men to view in regards to porn addiction.

Benner said the course was open to not only men who admitted they had a problem, but also for dads who want to keep their sons from this problem and other men in the church who wanted to understand how to help.

“That first man created a ripple,” Benner said.

The church then offered “Seven Pillars of Freedom” by the ministry group Pure Desire. It was a once a week meeting for an entire year.

The program created an in-depth understanding of what happens when pornography is absorbed repeatedly by the brain.

“After telling the same lie five times, your brain actually begins to believe it,” Benner said, which is what happens when the images are repeatedly and addictively viewed. Expectations in regards to intimacy and love are skewed.

Something Benner discovered in working with this program and with men of all ages who took part, is that there was a pattern in the addicted.

“One of the highest and most common traits include young men raised under strict, domineering rules with little love,” Benner said.

The pastoral team at the church began to realize that this problem was likely dominant in more than just the Richfield region.

A “Google” number was set in place and a sign was placed along Route 35 near the church. It was a means of allowing individuals to call and let a message without actually having to speak to someone. They would then receive a call back with resource information and an offer to take part in the program at Richfield Life Ministries.

There were over a dozen inquiries. Benner said about five of those inquiries did not want to attend the actual program but took the resource information to get help on their own.

Benner said he believes the problem is far more common than anyone realizes and it is also significant among men and teenage men in the church. The youngest response was a 14 year old. Elderly men have admitted a life-long addiction.

There is a sense of denial of the impact of pornography on Christians, however, as the church leans more toward the tolerances of the world.

He said the world does not recognize the dangers of pornography and how it destroys relationships. The images allow an individual to believe what is seen is realistic, which causes him or her to set unrealistic standards for spouses.

“No little girl wants to grow up and marry a husband who finds another woman more attractive than her,” Benner said.

And men are not the only ones succumbing to unrealistic expectations.

Women, too, are addicted.

Benner referenced the Fifty Shades of Gray movies and books.

“This creates an expectation of what men can’t live up to,” Benner said.

Benner gave a list of warning signs to determine whether your child or spouse has a hidden pornography addiction.

¯ He or she won’t let you look at his or her phone.

¯ The spouse has not been intimate.

¯ The spouse has an immense urge for intimacy.

¯ Withdrawing, irritable

Other things to be aware of in behavior include how the individual responds to people in their lives.

“A guy who is an addict may have a very cyclic sexual desire. He wants, wants, wants. And then he doesn’t.”

Benner said the individual may make references to what he or she sees in other men or women. The person may feel a need to make their significant other be like someone else.

“When you use the media as your standard for love and you try to make others like someone else,” Benner said, the definition of love is damaged.

“They don’t want you for you. They want you for something else. Porn creates a pretending situation that kills intimacy. That is the biggest issue. Pornography is more destructive than drugs. It affects marriages and has an incredibly far-reaching effect.”

The Seven Pillars course will be offered again in January at Richfield Life Ministries. Email conquerporn@gmail.com for information.